Dec 16, 2013

A Conversation to Remember

My usual disclaimer of ignorance on the matter and general naivety not withstanding in this case as the words are not mine, I do however, proclaim potential lack of cohesion of thought in the following words, not due to the intent and form of the narrative of the speaker (who speaks with amazing clarity and restraint), but from my possible inability to remember the details and specifics of articulation and semantic structures.

The speaker in this case is my Ammaavan (maternal uncle). The decision to pen down this conversation (more of a monologue actually), came from the realization towards the end of it, that it tied down intentionally or unintentionally (hmmmm.. leaning a bit towards the former), two very important concepts or rather levels of concepts regarding one's attitude towards life and the living of it as I, personally, favor it.

The whole thing started when, rather unusually and also surprisingly informally, I was asked to sit down and join the evening's usual pre-dinner television news viewing by Ammaavan and these days my Dad (ഇവിടെ ഇരിക്കൂ..).

Now, another disclaimer at this point - I'm writing this conversation down from memory and I'm writing down words that seem impersonal (at least to me) leaving out specific examples which he cited, as his personal views are not mine to publish and also (sheepishly grins) - I'm doing this without asking for his permission. Another big reason will become clear as the narrative unfolds. :D

I always wondered why Ammaavan viewed the news regularly and attentively as he is an ardent believer in the Vedantic philosophy of dis-attachment to tangible objects, material attitudes and ideologies. It is to be noted that he retired as a high ranking civil servant and also served in another important office of public service and tremendous responsibility since. He spoke in Malayalam, as he does at home and other informal situations, which I'm now translating to English to the best of my ability.

" I don't watch these things to actually get intellectually or emotionally involved in them. To me, they are more amusing, at this point, than anything else (referring to that evening's specific heated 'political' debate).

Why is it that we oppose something overtly, socially or politically? (realized he wanted my understanding of the issue he was about to expand upon and gave a short and somewhat hesitant reply). It is because we want to gain something from it. Specifically, the power or other such thing that the object of our opposition represents. This is one reason why studying history would show us that no socio-political revolution has actually succeeded. The thing being opposed is replaced with something different in form and structure but same in essence and nature.

But does that mean that there has been no change? No it does not. There has been. It's called evolution. Not just biological, but social and cultural. Evolution is the only change that we can't go back from. It is steady and natural. Certain people throughout history have been agents of such evolution as far as the human race is concerned. But they did this without looking for personal gain or results (without karthrithva bodha) and often died impoverished and in obscurity. Others however, will always be waiting to take up their idea or message and run with it, more often than not, intentionally or otherwise, gaining personal profit from it (tangible or not).

There is no reason to get indignant about this. It is the way of the world -  human nature. This happens usually when a concept or idea gets institutionalized or organized. It takes a life of its own and we should know that it is never a reflection on the person or persons behind the original idea.

Does this mean then that we do not get involved in society's occurrences, movements etc. or if we do, we should never start an organization/institution? No. As social animals and by virtue of our socio- cultural and human conscience, we may have to. And if a man has to accomplish something large or beyond the scope of his physical capabilities, in terms of resources or other practical constraints, organizing with others becomes necessary. In fact, it is even recommended in some cases. A simple example being - if you need to get a road tarred.. You can't do it by yourself. You need others.

But the ideal thing to do in such scenarios and other larger ones is to dissolve such organizations once the objective is accomplished. Otherwise the chances of it being distorted to serve the private purposes of a few are huge and perhaps inevitable. Another thing one can do, as an individual, is to refrain from joining an organization or institution (based on a particular ideology or concept), in one's personal life. This is something I took from the ideas of J. Krishnamurthy.

We can't choose to not react or get involved against something we find objectionable, especially if it happens before us. And we may even get attacked personally due to our involvement. But we need to have the mind and mental fortitude to do this knowing full well the potential personal consequences. It is illogical and naive to be shocked or surprised when something like that happens and be outraged or despair over the fact that our intentions were good and our actions were founded on a sense of justice and good.

This awareness is what Vedantic knowledge can give us. A certain 'knowing' that dis- attachment can give us peace while making us functioning human beings living in the material world. The knowledge that the events of life are out of our control and is not dependent on our abilities (physical, intellectual or emotional). Often we see people claiming accomplishments as their own and find reasons out of their sphere of control for their defeats or losses. Honest reflection and introspection reveals this to be a falsehood. In the larger scheme of things, we are insignificant. No human being has changed the world. The world changes and moves according it its own cosmic pattern or plan which we cannot comprehend through our limited intellect. As far as we are concerned, it is arbitrary. 'Knowing' this is realizing Brahma itself. It is not for everyone. Through some accumulated good from previous births or so, we can't be sure why, some unique individuals come to 'know' this.

I myself  am just aware of this or rather 'understand' it. I am neither enlightened or to be considered a role model of any sort. In fact, it is best not to consider any human being as a 'role model'. The secret to being happy in life is to find the balance between attachment and dis-attachment. Knowing when to get involved and when to observe. And not to let either case, in victory or defeat, affect you as a person. Live well and live happy. But be aware of the illusion of the world that you see before you and live in and the only truth - the one that's not subject to changes that lies within you. This is what life is about. To live through it as you can with this knowledge. Without Karthrithva Bodha. I am just a human being with my own petty concepts and likes/dislikes.

(conversation moves through various related topics and comes to an end..)

It seems that particular mosquito is not to be vanquished at the moment (moving his trusty mosquito zapper around his body and giving up). It must be destined to live a little longer. After all it is the same as me. We are one and the same (adds with a smile). This is the essence of Vedanta too. From the ant to the Parabrahma - it's one and the same."

Now a further set of disclaimers:
The conversation was much longer and involved a lot of other ideas and things including a lot of specific examples from books, philosophies and his own personal life. There were also brief interjections and words regarding the topic mentioned above and other things from Dad, Ammaayi (maternal aunt - who joined us briefly between her work in the kitchen) and yours truly. The quoted words above are the summarized and translated version from my own memory and understanding of it.

Apologies to Ammaavan if I inadvertently distorted his ideas or the intent behind them. Hmmm.. I guess I have to muster the necessary mental fortitude to suffer the consequences, if any, for my well intended capturing of an interesting conversation for posterity's sake and for self serving intellectual reference.. :D

Signing off.. sleepy but rejuvenated..

P.s. 'Previous births' can be defined or understood in two main ways - our subtle body occupying a new gross body upon leaving this one, or more scientifically (the one Ammaavan refers to) our hereditary history, that of our ancestors, present in us by virtue of our genetic make-up, i.e., recessive and dominant traits.

The balance between attachment and dis-attachment that he referred to (from what I understood) meant understanding that you're attached to your body, though it is not you, but maintaining no attachments to anything else (worldly matters and objects), and so being able to involve yourself in the world you live in without Karthrithva Bodha and holding on to relative inner peace. Vedantic awareness for those determined to live a worldly life (laukika jeevitha). 

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